Stuff New Moms Need

There are plenty of new moms in my family.  They are all are excited about the babies, most of them are new moms and one has multiple children.  One’s life changes as soon as the baby is home.   I would think the hardest thing about being a new mom is getting enough sleep, which can negatively impact other activities.  I decided to come up with a list of things that I believe a new mom needs to help her adjust to her new bundle of joy.

Maternity

So every new mom needs:

1. Chef – A new mom is tired, which means she does not need to be operating anything with fire or heat.   Having a chef may be a luxury, BUT family members and friends should make sure the new family is eating sensible meals everyday (well, at least, the first 4 weeks after delivery.)

2. Housekeeper – A healing mother should not be vacuuming or doing dishes the first month after delivery.

3. Babysitter – Now, some moms do not like to leave their child(ren) with other people.  (I suggest that they read Find The Time.)  First time moms should begin scouting out prospective babysitters while pregnant.  (This is important if new mom live in a place where she has little to no family members.)  New parents will need to find someone they respect and trust to take care of their child(ren).  I also suggest not burning bridges with people who would be great sitters.  Start with leaving the child with the sitter for a couple of hours and phase in more hours as he or she gets older.  For example, if the anniversary weekend is coming up and want to leave the child with grandma (do not let that be the first time he or she is away from for a long period of time.)

4. Date Night –  Date night is very important to rekindle the sparks in your relationship.  (Main reason why #3 is very important.)   I know people who do not spend much time without their child(ren).  That is a bad sign in a relationship.  Will the relationship last when the child(ren) leave to go to school?  Preservation of the relationship should be on-going and deliberate.

5. Pampering – (No connection to Pampers Diapers) A new mom must be reminded that it is ok for her to pamper herself or to be pampered.  Take her to her favorite cosmetic counter or to a spa.  She is stressed out (but may not want to say), so nudge her (kindly and gently) to take some time for herself.  A happy mom means a happy baby and, ultimately, a happy household.

So check on your new moms TODAY!!!!

Mix Maven

Parents, You Need An Intervention!

Last year I did a post entitled, Counting Up The Cost. The post was about how parents are buying their children expensive, luxury brands. Now, I stumble on another article about how parents are spending tens and thousands of dollars on kiddie birthday parties. America, we need a parent intervention!!

The problem did not start with MTV’s “My Super Sweet 16,” but I am sure that the show contributes to the excessiveness of parents and children. The CNN article highlighted a mother who spent $5,000 USD for a 3 year old toddler’s birthday party. The party had expensive favors, lavish entertainment, a four-layer cake. (That sounds like a wedding reception to me!)

Cake with bow

Another family spent $10 million on a bat mizpah. According to the CNN article, “former defense contractor David H. Brooks of Long Island reportedly spent in 2005 on his daughter’s bat mitzvah. That soirée, at the storied Rainbow Room in Rockefeller Center, featured 50 Cent, Don Henley and Aerosmith, among others.” (Sidebar: please note his career choice!!)

Above picture is a Coach™ – themed cake for a birthday party. This cake runs about $1500. I know many brides who spent less on their wedding cakes.

What kind of values are we passing on to our children, when we spend lavishly on a birthday party? To be honest, I do not think most of the parents have the money to spend on these parties, but they want to look like good parents by giving their children the “best” of everything.

I feel like children today do not have anything to look forward to in life. Parents shower them with expensive everything and when they get older, they will try to maintain the lifestyle and realize they cannot. At some point, these excessive acts must end. Parents have to realize that affection, love and care cannot be bought.

We are destroying our children by giving into their every whim or creating these whims. Parents need more backbone and learn how to say no. I tell you my parents had no problems telling my sibling and I “NO!!” on a regular basis. I do not even know how I would live in the world, if my parents spoiled me.

I believe the children are the future. Teach them well and let the lead the way. BUT we cannot do so if parents do not have any self-control.

Let us move up a little higher,

Mix Maven

Stuff Pregnant Women Like

This is the year of the Baby in my family. Four babies will be born in 2008. The current score is 2 out and 2 to go. 😉

I notice that the moms-to-be are all different and yet the same.

I have noticed that pregnant women like (not in any order):

  1. Consuming food they would not normally eat. One of my cousins loves sweet desserts (sidebar: does not include any sweet vegetable, which she already found utterly disgusting), especially an occasional cookie or yellow cake with lemon frosting. Currently, she is totally disgusted by any sweet food or drink. She told me she is buying juice that with 17g-25g of sugar (no high fructose corn syrup.) Very cool to me! 😉 My favorite cousin was chowing down on soul food in her first trimester, which is funny because she does not normally eat soul food.
  2. Banana Republic – Two of my cousins have been going to Banana Republic to purchase maternity clothes. (No, BR does not sell maternity clothes) The blouson tops and dresses allow them to hit up the clearance rack for cute clothes without having to spend the high price of maternity branded clothes.Banana Republic Rouge TopBanana Republic Silver Flutter Top
  3. Pregnancy websites and blogs. Books are great, but pregnant women love to read these websites and blogs because they get updated information and cool 3-D womb shots and fetal development e-mails. Check out Nymbler (a baby naming tool, quite innovative. Select your names that you like and the wizard will help you find other names that you might like) and BabyCenter.com
  4. Guilt – This can be a valuable tool when asking husband to trek in the middle of the night to get food or get a glass of water downstairs in the kitchen. This should be used sparingly because you do not want to cause any feelings of resentment.
  5. Looking at paint store websites. My favorite cousin’s latest obsession (again) is BenjaminMoore.com. She loves to decorate anyway and pregnancy has brought on a new project for her. She has been creating different color combos for me to check out. Oh fun times!!Benjamin Moore Paint
  6. Watching or recording the Baby Story on TLC. My cousin told me about how some of these women, the first-timers, want to have natural, drug-free delivery. I asked her would she do that and her answer is “HELL NOOOOO!!”
  7. Shopping for nursery furniture. (see #5)
  8. Shopping for baby clothes and accessories
  9. Expensive diaper bags. On my cousin’s wish list: A Louis Vuitton Diaper bag (that is a no-go area) Louis Vuitton Diaper Bag - Source: Eluxury.com or a Coach (more acceptable) Coach Signature Stripe Large Tote
  10. Talking about their pregnancies. My fave cousin finds this conversation tends to be initiated by friends who already have kids and want to tell her about what they went through. She finds most of the information irrelevant to her situation.

I will update from time to time. Fun learning new things about motherhood.

Keep Believing,

Sexual Carob

Party All The Time

Hey Pumps And Gloss-y Ones,

As many of you know, Mix Maven loves the shimmer and glimmer, which is one of the reasons why I love the Holiday season. Many of us will have many shindigs to attend, which means we have to be looking good. (Please make sure to acquire appropriate attire for your parties. For example, if you are going to a formal church banquet, no one should have to accidentally see the crack of your buttocks.)

I like J. Crew and I think this store is a good place to find classic, tasteful looks for any occasion.

I found this wonderful dress in the clearance section of the website. The empire waist is flattering on most figures. Pair with chunky pearl necklace or white gold or sterling silver with a solitaire pendant.

JCrew Sophia Silk Dress in Deep Forest

I like this dress. This J. Crew Silk Taffeta Dress in Charcoal is for ladies that are not too busty. (If you are busty, back away from this dress right now!!) What about pairing this dress with blue or olive leather opera gloves for a pop of color?

JCrew Charcoal Silk Taffeta Ballerina Dress

Carolina Amato Gloves Blue - Source: Eluxury.comCarolina Amato Gloves Olive - Source: Eluxury.com

I am totally in love with the Black Betsey Johnson and Kelly Green Maggy London shift dresses. The sequins brighten up the Betsey Johnson dress. Most, if not all, body types would look great in this style of dress.

Betsey Johnson Paillette Trim Silk Shift - Source: Nordstrom.com

I adore the layered box pleated-collar because it creates visual interest to an otherwise plain dress. The silk chiffon is glorious and looks chic and comfortable. This dress is also figure flattering and great for the petite ladies who are a few months pregnant.

Maggy London Silk Chiffon - Source: Nordstrom.com

If you get bored with all the carols and other holiday songs at the soirée, ask the DJ to play “Dumb it Down” by Lupe Fiasco …. great message in the song!!

My new favorite song!!

Tis The Season to be Jolly,

Mix Maven

We Gather Together

Hey Pumps and Glossy ones,

God willing, next week this time, we will be en route to our Thanksgiving destination, cooking up a storm, and/or getting ready for the Turkey day football match-up.

Turkey Dinner

I recall a former classmate whining about feeling forced to spend time with her family and friends. She wanted to control how often the family gathered together. I told her to take it for what it was that if people wanted to get together for major holidays, then deal with it another way. Stop all the whining!

As we were reminded over the weekend, family and friends should not be taken for granted. I know that many of us make sure we connect with our loved ones.

We have a lot to be thankful for. In our daily devotionals, Mr. Maven and I thank God for our blessings. There are times in life, when everything is not what we want it to be, but God continues to provide.

What do you have to be thankful for? My friend LH and I were talking about how God has strengthened our Faith because sometimes we do things that we did not intend to do on a specific occasion like give an extra offering, helping out a student, church member or neighbor in need. God continues to provide and we are thankful. For example, one of my “aunts” told us about how she helped a friend who needed money, she gave the lady all the cash she had. She was happy that she could help her friend. She was reading her Bible and she found the exact amount of cash that she gave her friend. She is not sure how the money got there!! Wow, what a praise report!

So as we see, we all have something to be grateful for. Even if you are not a particularly religious, that does not exempt you from being thankful. Keep a Grateful or Thanksgiving journal. You will be surprised at all the things you have to be thankful for.

The ladies of Pumps and Gloss wish all of our wonderful readers a wonderful, fun and safe Thanksgiving.

Happy Thanksgiving,

Mix Maven 

Sex and Food

The erotic power of food has been celebrated for centuries. Casanova was said to share oysters with his paramours to wet their sexual appetites. Greek and Roman cultures enjoyed a parade of ripe fruits and exotic dishes before engaging in sensual pleasures.

I asked a close friend of mine what was his first thought when he thinks of food and sex, and his first response was, “Two words come to mind…ORAL FIXATION.”  He said this because of the union of sexual intercourse with your five senses (hearing, seeing, smelling and tasting and touching).  You are either biting or sucking on something; now lets add some flavor.  Once you put it all together, you have the ultimate satisfaction of what you love to do, combined with the orgasmic flavor.  

According to the Cosmo.com article “How to Make Sex Even Yummier“, the following foods can help make your nights a little naughtier:

Popsicles
Fruit-flavored pops aren’t just for kids — they can cool you off when you’re heated up under the covers. After getting hot with kissing and foreplay, A young lady wrote that her guy likes to get a pop from the fridge and trace it around the inner arms, the backs of her knees, buns and along her inner thighs. “The sensation of this block of ice against sweaty skin is amazing — She practically melts the pop with her body heat alone.”

Seltzer Water
You know that bubbly feeling on your tongue after you sip carbonated water? A few drops on your breasts will provide just the right foreplay fizz. One young lady wrote that her boyfriend poured a few drops inside her lace bra, then blows on the droplets as they dried. It gave her this extra goose-bumpy tickle.”

Ice and Hot Tea
This hot-and-cold combo is so erotic, your man will never think of a tea party in the same way again. “Sip the hot tea so your mouth and tongue get as steamy as you can stand,” explains Lou Paget, author of The Big O: Orgasms. “Then go down on him so he feels the warmth of your mouth against his own hot skin. Next, suck on the ice cube to cool your mouth off.” When you go down again, the difference in temperature will drive him wild.

Soaked Cotton Balls
Drench a cotton ball in a sweet liqueur like amaretto or creme de menthe, then run it down his treasure trail and around and behind his testicles, licking up the liqueur as you go and planting tiny kisses on his most responsive body parts. The alcohol will evaporate quickly, leaving behind a tingly, cool sensation.

Pop Rocks
Sprinkle a few of these candies on your tongue just before puckering up. They’ll “explode” as you’re making out, and your tongue will feel a bubbly, popping sensation.: Pop Rocks are tingly and fun, but the main bonus is that  it will bring you back to when kissing was sexy in itself, not just a five-second detour on the road to sex.

Cake-Icing Tubes
Write a word or phrase on your man’s back with icing, then ask him to guess what it says. Spell out I love you or script dirty things you want to do to him. Or draw an arrow on your body to the spot you want him to touch. It’s a hint he’ll love to take — and lick off you later.

Too-Hot Treats
Nuking marshmallows, fudge or honey and pouring the mixture onto your man sounds like a yummy idea, but be cognizant of the potential for injury. Scorching gooey substances can cause superficial burns to the sensitive skin around a guy’s equipment (the same goes for candle wax). Stay in lukewarm territory.

As I was thinking about this topic, the first thing that popped into my mind was the movie “9 ½ weeks”.  I have included a scene from the movie.  A word of caution for those at work – you may want to watch this at home. JUST A WORD OF CAUTION!!!!!

Have a Tantalizing Weekend!

Sensual Element