Stuff New Moms Need

There are plenty of new moms in my family.  They are all are excited about the babies, most of them are new moms and one has multiple children.  One’s life changes as soon as the baby is home.   I would think the hardest thing about being a new mom is getting enough sleep, which can negatively impact other activities.  I decided to come up with a list of things that I believe a new mom needs to help her adjust to her new bundle of joy.

Maternity

So every new mom needs:

1. Chef – A new mom is tired, which means she does not need to be operating anything with fire or heat.   Having a chef may be a luxury, BUT family members and friends should make sure the new family is eating sensible meals everyday (well, at least, the first 4 weeks after delivery.)

2. Housekeeper – A healing mother should not be vacuuming or doing dishes the first month after delivery.

3. Babysitter – Now, some moms do not like to leave their child(ren) with other people.  (I suggest that they read Find The Time.)  First time moms should begin scouting out prospective babysitters while pregnant.  (This is important if new mom live in a place where she has little to no family members.)  New parents will need to find someone they respect and trust to take care of their child(ren).  I also suggest not burning bridges with people who would be great sitters.  Start with leaving the child with the sitter for a couple of hours and phase in more hours as he or she gets older.  For example, if the anniversary weekend is coming up and want to leave the child with grandma (do not let that be the first time he or she is away from for a long period of time.)

4. Date Night –  Date night is very important to rekindle the sparks in your relationship.  (Main reason why #3 is very important.)   I know people who do not spend much time without their child(ren).  That is a bad sign in a relationship.  Will the relationship last when the child(ren) leave to go to school?  Preservation of the relationship should be on-going and deliberate.

5. Pampering – (No connection to Pampers Diapers) A new mom must be reminded that it is ok for her to pamper herself or to be pampered.  Take her to her favorite cosmetic counter or to a spa.  She is stressed out (but may not want to say), so nudge her (kindly and gently) to take some time for herself.  A happy mom means a happy baby and, ultimately, a happy household.

So check on your new moms TODAY!!!!

Mix Maven

Parents, You Need An Intervention!

Last year I did a post entitled, Counting Up The Cost. The post was about how parents are buying their children expensive, luxury brands. Now, I stumble on another article about how parents are spending tens and thousands of dollars on kiddie birthday parties. America, we need a parent intervention!!

The problem did not start with MTV’s “My Super Sweet 16,” but I am sure that the show contributes to the excessiveness of parents and children. The CNN article highlighted a mother who spent $5,000 USD for a 3 year old toddler’s birthday party. The party had expensive favors, lavish entertainment, a four-layer cake. (That sounds like a wedding reception to me!)

Cake with bow

Another family spent $10 million on a bat mizpah. According to the CNN article, “former defense contractor David H. Brooks of Long Island reportedly spent in 2005 on his daughter’s bat mitzvah. That soirée, at the storied Rainbow Room in Rockefeller Center, featured 50 Cent, Don Henley and Aerosmith, among others.” (Sidebar: please note his career choice!!)

Above picture is a Coach™ – themed cake for a birthday party. This cake runs about $1500. I know many brides who spent less on their wedding cakes.

What kind of values are we passing on to our children, when we spend lavishly on a birthday party? To be honest, I do not think most of the parents have the money to spend on these parties, but they want to look like good parents by giving their children the “best” of everything.

I feel like children today do not have anything to look forward to in life. Parents shower them with expensive everything and when they get older, they will try to maintain the lifestyle and realize they cannot. At some point, these excessive acts must end. Parents have to realize that affection, love and care cannot be bought.

We are destroying our children by giving into their every whim or creating these whims. Parents need more backbone and learn how to say no. I tell you my parents had no problems telling my sibling and I “NO!!” on a regular basis. I do not even know how I would live in the world, if my parents spoiled me.

I believe the children are the future. Teach them well and let the lead the way. BUT we cannot do so if parents do not have any self-control.

Let us move up a little higher,

Mix Maven

Stuff Pregnant Women Like

This is the year of the Baby in my family. Four babies will be born in 2008. The current score is 2 out and 2 to go. 😉

I notice that the moms-to-be are all different and yet the same.

I have noticed that pregnant women like (not in any order):

  1. Consuming food they would not normally eat. One of my cousins loves sweet desserts (sidebar: does not include any sweet vegetable, which she already found utterly disgusting), especially an occasional cookie or yellow cake with lemon frosting. Currently, she is totally disgusted by any sweet food or drink. She told me she is buying juice that with 17g-25g of sugar (no high fructose corn syrup.) Very cool to me! 😉 My favorite cousin was chowing down on soul food in her first trimester, which is funny because she does not normally eat soul food.
  2. Banana Republic – Two of my cousins have been going to Banana Republic to purchase maternity clothes. (No, BR does not sell maternity clothes) The blouson tops and dresses allow them to hit up the clearance rack for cute clothes without having to spend the high price of maternity branded clothes.Banana Republic Rouge TopBanana Republic Silver Flutter Top
  3. Pregnancy websites and blogs. Books are great, but pregnant women love to read these websites and blogs because they get updated information and cool 3-D womb shots and fetal development e-mails. Check out Nymbler (a baby naming tool, quite innovative. Select your names that you like and the wizard will help you find other names that you might like) and BabyCenter.com
  4. Guilt – This can be a valuable tool when asking husband to trek in the middle of the night to get food or get a glass of water downstairs in the kitchen. This should be used sparingly because you do not want to cause any feelings of resentment.
  5. Looking at paint store websites. My favorite cousin’s latest obsession (again) is BenjaminMoore.com. She loves to decorate anyway and pregnancy has brought on a new project for her. She has been creating different color combos for me to check out. Oh fun times!!Benjamin Moore Paint
  6. Watching or recording the Baby Story on TLC. My cousin told me about how some of these women, the first-timers, want to have natural, drug-free delivery. I asked her would she do that and her answer is “HELL NOOOOO!!”
  7. Shopping for nursery furniture. (see #5)
  8. Shopping for baby clothes and accessories
  9. Expensive diaper bags. On my cousin’s wish list: A Louis Vuitton Diaper bag (that is a no-go area) Louis Vuitton Diaper Bag - Source: Eluxury.com or a Coach (more acceptable) Coach Signature Stripe Large Tote
  10. Talking about their pregnancies. My fave cousin finds this conversation tends to be initiated by friends who already have kids and want to tell her about what they went through. She finds most of the information irrelevant to her situation.

I will update from time to time. Fun learning new things about motherhood.

Keep Believing,

Sexual Carob

Do You Believe The Children Are The Future?

Hey Pumps and Gloss-ers,

Mr. Maven and I were watching a program on C-SPAN, which featured US House Representative Danny K. Davis giving a speech at The City Club of Chicago. He stated that more male teachers are needed in early childhood development and elementary education. He said that boys often think learning is for girls because most, if not all, of the teachers are women.

So I suggested to Mr. Maven that he could do some in-kind contributions, i.e. reading, to local Headstart programs and elementary schools. I ran the idea by Mama Maven, a HeadStart teacher. She thought the guest story time reader was a great idea, so we set up a date for Mr. Maven to go to the school.

Wednesday, January 23, 2008 was the date that was set for Mr. Maven to read to the students, ages 3-5 years old. He selected, Do Not Let The Pigeon Drive The Bus!

Do Not Let The Pigeon Drive The Bus

The children were very excited about the book and Mr. Maven made the book quite fun and interactive for the children. He asked the children several times, “should you let the pigeon drive the bus?” The children screamed, “NO!!” The reading was too much fun for teachers, students and guests.

Mr. Maven will make more visits to the HeadStart to read to the children, our future!

I recommend that you nudge all your male loved ones (especially those who are making positive contributions to the society at-large) to participate in this type of in-kind giving. Bear in mind that interested parties will need to have background checks, BUT the process is well worth it.

Find Your Strength In Love,

Mix Maven